Waltz Me Around Again, Willie

Også kjent som “Limericks”, “Chinamen Never Eat Chili” og sikkert mange flere.
Refrengene går ut på å komme med fornærmelser til alt og alle.

Innspillinger

The Limerick Song Kilde:YouTube
Jack Hylton Orch. - Rhymes Kilde:Internet Archive

Tekst

Melodi:Cielito Lindo

Ay, yi, yi, yi! Your mother swims after troop ships.
Now, sing me another verse that’s worse than the other verse
[alt: “Now, sing me a chorus, I’ll rub your clitoris.”]
And waltz me around again, Willie!
[alt: “And waltz me around on your willie!”]

There once was a man from Beirut
Who had several warts on his root.
He put acid on these and now, when he pees,
He holds the damn thing like a flute!

Ay, yi, yi, yi! Your sister does squat-thrusts on flagpoles.
Now, sing me another verse that’s worse than the other verse
And waltz me around again, Willie!

There once was a man from Nantucket
Whose c— was so long, he could suck it.
He said with a grin as he wiped off his chin,
«If this were a c—, I could f— it!»

Ay, yi, yi, yi! Your grandmother works on a corner.
Now, sing me another verse that’s worse than the other verse
And waltz me around again, Willie!

Oscar Brand “Limericks” version:

There once was a poet from McNameter
Whose mistress kept calling him amateur.
She said, “Your technique is too rough & antique
And your rhythm’s iambic pentameter!”

Ay, yi, yi, yi! In China, they do it for chili.
So, Here comes another verse that’s worse than the other verse
So, waltz me around again, Willie!

There once was a girl from St. Paul
Wore a newspaper out to a ball.
There came a great fire, which burned her attire
The front page, sports section and all.

CHORUS

A hermit who lived in Belgrave
Kept a dead prostitute in his cave
Says he, “I’ll admit I’m a bit of a nit,
But think of the money I save!”

CHORUS

There once was a maiden name Myrtle
Who amused herself with a sea turtle.
And what was phenomenal, her swelling abdominal
Revealed that the turtle was fertile!

CHORUS

A newsboy from London named Grimes
Lured maids onto infamous crimes.
“I delivered” he’d boast “Two Globes and a Post.
And Goodness knows how many Times!”

CHORUS

A very coy girl from Siam
Remarked to her boyfriend to try-am.
“To undress me, of course, you might have to use force
But the Lord knows you’re stronger than I am!”

CHORUS

There was a maid married at Chester.
Her mother first cried and then blessed her.
She said, “What a joy! He’s a wonderful boy!
I’ve had him myself down in Leicester!”

CHORUS

There once was a maitre d’Hotel
Who said, “My guests can all go to Hell.
What they do to my wife is the bane of my life!
The worst is: they do it so well!”

Ay, yi, yi, yi! In China, they do it for chili.
We haven’t another verse that worse than the other verse
So, waltz me ar